Lately Jeff and I have been discussing where to move next year. A&M has different tracks in different cities for third and fourth year. We are trying to choose between Round Rock (Jeff's current track), Houston, Dallas, and Temple. Jeff will spend most of his time in the hospital.
Does anybody have a good word to put in for any of these cities? We have been to all of them and they all have good qualities. We have to decide by December, I believe and it depends on which tracks are available when we apply. Houston has the best medical center. Round Rock and Dallas would be cool places to live, in my opinion. Temple has a great hospital, has low cost of living, and is close to bigger cities. Decisions...
In my experience I have loved everywhere I have lived; I have made great friends and enjoyed my surroundings. I know that wherever we choose will have great qualities and good people. It's just tricky deciding.
Where would you live?
Monday, September 28, 2015
Tuesday, August 5, 2014
5 Wrong Ways to Move
Hey everybody!
Now that I've got the solid update taken care of, I thought I would share something that has been on my mind:
I have moved somewhere around 20 times... Really. I went to 16 schools between kindergarten and high school. I also moved three times in college (and four times this summer if you count sheer box moving from place to place). Sheesh! I have only met a handful of people who have moved as often, and yes, all of them have military ties of some sort. I don't.
I just graduated and so many of my closest friends are heading off in different directions. I figure it's timely to share some of the lessons I've learned along the way. :)
#1. Make new friends and ignore the ones you had before moving
This one maybe only applies to me, as I developed habits of letting go early on. I imagine most people that have been in one or two places their whole life might not struggle with this as much as I have.
There are plenty of people in this world that I still regard as a best friend, although I have not seen or talked to them in years. I've only just learned that most of these people do not feel the same way about me anymore. I guess consistency is a major friendship thing. In my experience I've noticed that a lot of people will say that they will stay in contact with you... and then they won't. That's okay. Kind of. Life goes on and it turns out it's kind of hard to keep up long-distance friendships.
Perhaps a good option in the first place would be to set realistic goals. Leaving friends is pretty difficult for me, but you both find that the Earth still spins after moving. Maybe agree up front to contact each other, say, once a month, instead of once a week. It may sound insensitive to some, but it's better (in my opinion) than forgetting about each other and feeling guilty. That is not good. Be flexible and considerate of each other's lives. I don't get offended if someone forgets about me and I hope they do the same in return.
#2. Wallow in self-pity and lament your relocation to new associates
This one is embarrassing, haha. Granted, I think the last time I did this I was in eighth grade, but still. It's still a little tempting each time I move. I remember being at a ward Christmas party, sitting on Santa's lap (what? Why?) and saying, in front of two or three new friends, "Santa, I just want my old home and friends back." Oh my goodness. So dramatic. I can sympathize with pre-pubescent Claire, but still. I had new friends! They were really nice (Missoula peeps, if you read my blog, haha)!
Here's how I would--and do--handle my feelings now: "Wow, you guys are so cool! Thanks for letting me tag along with you [even though I am obviously caught in the throes of a middle-school crises]." I would be the realest kind of upbeat, because, guess what; you can find good, like-minded people pretty much anywhere if you adopt a healthy perspective.
#3. Impress the people around with your razzle dazzle and make them want to hang out with you
This one comes from Dale Carnegie's [daughter], How to Win Friends and Influence People [for Teen Girls], which my loving parents bought for me in eighth grade, haha.
The concept here is that you will make friend's more easily by becoming genuinely interested in others than by trying to make others interested in you. Seriously. This one is easy to miss for me sometimes. I move in like an excited chihuahua and want to shout, "Hi! I'm Claire! I sing and dance and watch me put my foot on the back of my head!! Also, I'm sooo nice!" There is really no need to do this. At all. This totally rubs some people the wrong way anyway.
Here's a better approach: "Your name is what? You are from where? Oh, I've heard of that place! Don't they have ______? Cool (only say it if you mean it)!" Really, people like to be liked. Disclaimer: just be real! The more you let someone else open up, the more you may find you have in common with that person. Smile and be polite. Read social cues, like a glance at a watch or breaking eye contact with you. Just be a chill, personable little person and you will get along just fine!
#4. Listen "intently" to what others say to you and then dump the information a nano-second later
This one is a biggie for me. I am pretty detail-oriented and I remember names really well. I think this came from so many moves. It takes dedication. I've totally been there. I'll ask, "Oh, what's your name?" and as they are telling me, I am thinking about how pretty their earrings are or something and miss the name entirely. Then I'm locked in and have no other option than to find their name out secretly later or ask for it again. Note: there is no problem forgetting someone's name, especially when you are new and memorizing everybody's names; however, when you remember somebody's name (where they're from, which school they went to, etc.) that signals to them that you cared enough to log it away in your brain! That's great! Again, people like to feel interesting to others.
Here's how I remember names. I just concentrate on it as they tell me. If it's something not as "sticky" for me, sometimes I'll repeat it back or use it in a following sentence, like, "Thanks for sitting by me, Becky." Sometimes if I lose the memory of the person saying their name, I'll retain the memory of me saying their name. Also, if the name is tricky or hard to pronounce for me, I'll try to connect to something I do know. I'll tell myself, 'that sounds like ______, but with and "N."'
A last little tip on remembering names: I find that attaching someone's name to physical attributes is good, but only if it's something permanent; I.e., tall, brown eyes, cute nose. I say this because if you remember somebody for their mint jeans and top knot, you might run into that person at the gym, and have no idea who that person is. It's just more practical to commit more lasting characteristics to memory, in my experience.
#5. Figure there's no place like home and watch "Parks and Rec" all day.
This has two implications:
(1) Staying at your new home all day is bad news, and
(2) Assuming no place could possibly as good (or better) than your last place
Guess what, I have loved everywhere I have lived. I really mean that. Every situation seems to have ups and downs. Take Texas for example, it is full of great food and friends and fun... and somebody got in our car last week. Strange. So very strange, indeed.
Bonus: #6. Lose yourself out there
Okay, so each move presents a blank slate. I've arrived in Texas pretty much as myself, but if I wanted to I could introduce myself as Clefairy, a tight-rope-walking vegan. This sounds like a far cry, but I've been Clarissa, the no-meat-eating triathlete before. It's a great time to leave the past behind you. Maybe you use to cry a lot in your last place and you'd like to give that up. Maybe you were a bully. Maybe you weren't as close to God as you would like to be. Moving is a great time to restructure some of those things because there is no one to say, "You don't do that."
While this is great, it is important to stay true to yourself. For me, I know the things I want to keep the most consistent throughout my whole life is that I am clean, I love my husband, and I am trying to be like Jesus. With this in mind, I am looking for new friends who will support me in those decisions. I know that I become a lot like the people I spend the most time with.
Well, I hope this hasn't come across as too preachy. I like learning from others' experiences and figure someone might benefit from what I have to say, too.
If you know anyone who is moving, restarting, or could in some other way benefit from reading this, please share it!
If you have any tips you could add, please comment below. I'd love to interact with you and find out what has helped you (I did just move, you know?)!
I hope you have a great day!
Now that I've got the solid update taken care of, I thought I would share something that has been on my mind:
I have moved somewhere around 20 times... Really. I went to 16 schools between kindergarten and high school. I also moved three times in college (and four times this summer if you count sheer box moving from place to place). Sheesh! I have only met a handful of people who have moved as often, and yes, all of them have military ties of some sort. I don't.
I just graduated and so many of my closest friends are heading off in different directions. I figure it's timely to share some of the lessons I've learned along the way. :)
#1. Make new friends and ignore the ones you had before moving
This one maybe only applies to me, as I developed habits of letting go early on. I imagine most people that have been in one or two places their whole life might not struggle with this as much as I have.
There are plenty of people in this world that I still regard as a best friend, although I have not seen or talked to them in years. I've only just learned that most of these people do not feel the same way about me anymore. I guess consistency is a major friendship thing. In my experience I've noticed that a lot of people will say that they will stay in contact with you... and then they won't. That's okay. Kind of. Life goes on and it turns out it's kind of hard to keep up long-distance friendships.
Perhaps a good option in the first place would be to set realistic goals. Leaving friends is pretty difficult for me, but you both find that the Earth still spins after moving. Maybe agree up front to contact each other, say, once a month, instead of once a week. It may sound insensitive to some, but it's better (in my opinion) than forgetting about each other and feeling guilty. That is not good. Be flexible and considerate of each other's lives. I don't get offended if someone forgets about me and I hope they do the same in return.
#2. Wallow in self-pity and lament your relocation to new associates
This one is embarrassing, haha. Granted, I think the last time I did this I was in eighth grade, but still. It's still a little tempting each time I move. I remember being at a ward Christmas party, sitting on Santa's lap (what? Why?) and saying, in front of two or three new friends, "Santa, I just want my old home and friends back." Oh my goodness. So dramatic. I can sympathize with pre-pubescent Claire, but still. I had new friends! They were really nice (Missoula peeps, if you read my blog, haha)!
Here's how I would--and do--handle my feelings now: "Wow, you guys are so cool! Thanks for letting me tag along with you [even though I am obviously caught in the throes of a middle-school crises]." I would be the realest kind of upbeat, because, guess what; you can find good, like-minded people pretty much anywhere if you adopt a healthy perspective.
#3. Impress the people around with your razzle dazzle and make them want to hang out with you
This one comes from Dale Carnegie's [daughter], How to Win Friends and Influence People [for Teen Girls], which my loving parents bought for me in eighth grade, haha.
Here's a better approach: "Your name is what? You are from where? Oh, I've heard of that place! Don't they have ______? Cool (only say it if you mean it)!" Really, people like to be liked. Disclaimer: just be real! The more you let someone else open up, the more you may find you have in common with that person. Smile and be polite. Read social cues, like a glance at a watch or breaking eye contact with you. Just be a chill, personable little person and you will get along just fine!
#4. Listen "intently" to what others say to you and then dump the information a nano-second later
This one is a biggie for me. I am pretty detail-oriented and I remember names really well. I think this came from so many moves. It takes dedication. I've totally been there. I'll ask, "Oh, what's your name?" and as they are telling me, I am thinking about how pretty their earrings are or something and miss the name entirely. Then I'm locked in and have no other option than to find their name out secretly later or ask for it again. Note: there is no problem forgetting someone's name, especially when you are new and memorizing everybody's names; however, when you remember somebody's name (where they're from, which school they went to, etc.) that signals to them that you cared enough to log it away in your brain! That's great! Again, people like to feel interesting to others.
Here's how I remember names. I just concentrate on it as they tell me. If it's something not as "sticky" for me, sometimes I'll repeat it back or use it in a following sentence, like, "Thanks for sitting by me, Becky." Sometimes if I lose the memory of the person saying their name, I'll retain the memory of me saying their name. Also, if the name is tricky or hard to pronounce for me, I'll try to connect to something I do know. I'll tell myself, 'that sounds like ______, but with and "N."'
A last little tip on remembering names: I find that attaching someone's name to physical attributes is good, but only if it's something permanent; I.e., tall, brown eyes, cute nose. I say this because if you remember somebody for their mint jeans and top knot, you might run into that person at the gym, and have no idea who that person is. It's just more practical to commit more lasting characteristics to memory, in my experience.
#5. Figure there's no place like home and watch "Parks and Rec" all day.
This has two implications:
(1) Staying at your new home all day is bad news, and
(2) Assuming no place could possibly as good (or better) than your last place
Guess what, I have loved everywhere I have lived. I really mean that. Every situation seems to have ups and downs. Take Texas for example, it is full of great food and friends and fun... and somebody got in our car last week. Strange. So very strange, indeed.
Bonus: #6. Lose yourself out there
Okay, so each move presents a blank slate. I've arrived in Texas pretty much as myself, but if I wanted to I could introduce myself as Clefairy, a tight-rope-walking vegan. This sounds like a far cry, but I've been Clarissa, the no-meat-eating triathlete before. It's a great time to leave the past behind you. Maybe you use to cry a lot in your last place and you'd like to give that up. Maybe you were a bully. Maybe you weren't as close to God as you would like to be. Moving is a great time to restructure some of those things because there is no one to say, "You don't do that."
While this is great, it is important to stay true to yourself. For me, I know the things I want to keep the most consistent throughout my whole life is that I am clean, I love my husband, and I am trying to be like Jesus. With this in mind, I am looking for new friends who will support me in those decisions. I know that I become a lot like the people I spend the most time with.
Well, I hope this hasn't come across as too preachy. I like learning from others' experiences and figure someone might benefit from what I have to say, too.
If you know anyone who is moving, restarting, or could in some other way benefit from reading this, please share it!
If you have any tips you could add, please comment below. I'd love to interact with you and find out what has helped you (I did just move, you know?)!
I hope you have a great day!
Friday, July 18, 2014
Mistakes
Only ten-or-so posts in and I'm composing a serious one--oh boy. But really, please read this. Please help us or just learn from our silly, but consequence-provoking experience today.
I am living in Bryan, TX. As a matter of fact I have lived here for a little over a day. While I really like Texas so far, it has been a bit of a ride. Read on.
After a reasonably pleasant 20-or-so-hour drive across the country we arrived at our apartment complex office. Eager to see our apartment in person for the first time, we naively filled out our leasing agreement and paid our first and last month's rent. The thought never occurred to us to scope out our new home before signing... can you see where this is going? Despite decent reviews, we were not prepared for what was yet to come:
After pulling up the moving van to the curb in what actually turned out to be a flash flood, I had a feeling to lower my expectations spectacularly. We swung the door open to meet a ceiling fan swinging threateningly off it's axil, a pungent wall of cigarette fumes, and a floor plan--to our great surprise--we had never even seen before. That's right, a different apartment, free of the granite countertops, black cabinets, spacious bedroom, and walk in closets that lured us away from other reasonable apartments.
This is all sort of embarrassing to admit, really. We just had no idea.
I actually said, "Well, this is kind of a let-down." Never had it crossed my mind that the apartment might have allowed smoking. Neither had it occurred to me that we could be mislead by pictures and reviews (I can tell if someone used a wide-angle lens in their pictures so I thought we were good). I was just totally naive. We stuck it out for a while, but eventually cracked, "Jeff, someone pooped in our toilet; I know because there are skid marks (haha)," "Claire, this is a totally different apartment than they told us we were getting," etc. Panic mildly washed over us, but not completely because we figured, hey, we have lived here for, what, three hours? Of course the management will rectify these issues and we'll be out before we know it.
We headed over to the office and mustered up the courage to mention the stinky smoke, which had made me totally sick. They were kind enough to send a guy over to take care of it... Except that he just told us, "This stuff makes it smell good." and sprayed what seemed like super Febreeze into our air conditioning unit. Three hours later, the apartment smelled exactly the same. This time I got massive headache and a sick-y stomach. Cool.
Amidst this, Jeff and I decided firmly that this place didn't meet our needs at all and that we really couldn't live in the odor (which really is pretty intense; our clothing totally smells like it. In fact, it simply seems as though someone is smoking right in our living room relentlessly. We took our concerns and four reasons for wanting to leave to the management. They were:
1. Cigarette smoke
2. We felt mislead
3. The apartment needed repairs
4. the overarching fact that we didn't get the apartment we planned on and didn't want to live there
While the management was very kind in handling the issues, they didn't have anything to offer on ending our contract and said we could sublease or relet the apartment (and be held responsible for any damage or fees on the subleaser's part).
Taking advice from parents and friends, we then contacted the regional manager and Texas Apartment Association. Both suggested subleasing or reletting. Still there was not even a hope for ending the year-long contract.
The accompanying trouble is that some apartments won't let us a sign a contract with them until we have written proof that our current contract has ended (understandably, of course). We just feel stuck...
We also learned that many universities have attorneys at no cost for students. We called at set up an appointment. So here we are, staying at a hotel while we pray for a miracle (because the conditions totally stink. Double. Meaning). So my serious question, has anyone been in a situation like this and made it out okay? I'm sure we sound high maintenance, but I ugly cried at the prospect of a year's worth of secondhand smoke piping right into our home we didn't even want. See ya; I've got some Blue Bell consolation ice cream calling my name...
I am living in Bryan, TX. As a matter of fact I have lived here for a little over a day. While I really like Texas so far, it has been a bit of a ride. Read on.
After a reasonably pleasant 20-or-so-hour drive across the country we arrived at our apartment complex office. Eager to see our apartment in person for the first time, we naively filled out our leasing agreement and paid our first and last month's rent. The thought never occurred to us to scope out our new home before signing... can you see where this is going? Despite decent reviews, we were not prepared for what was yet to come:
After pulling up the moving van to the curb in what actually turned out to be a flash flood, I had a feeling to lower my expectations spectacularly. We swung the door open to meet a ceiling fan swinging threateningly off it's axil, a pungent wall of cigarette fumes, and a floor plan--to our great surprise--we had never even seen before. That's right, a different apartment, free of the granite countertops, black cabinets, spacious bedroom, and walk in closets that lured us away from other reasonable apartments.
This is all sort of embarrassing to admit, really. We just had no idea.
I actually said, "Well, this is kind of a let-down." Never had it crossed my mind that the apartment might have allowed smoking. Neither had it occurred to me that we could be mislead by pictures and reviews (I can tell if someone used a wide-angle lens in their pictures so I thought we were good). I was just totally naive. We stuck it out for a while, but eventually cracked, "Jeff, someone pooped in our toilet; I know because there are skid marks (haha)," "Claire, this is a totally different apartment than they told us we were getting," etc. Panic mildly washed over us, but not completely because we figured, hey, we have lived here for, what, three hours? Of course the management will rectify these issues and we'll be out before we know it.
We headed over to the office and mustered up the courage to mention the stinky smoke, which had made me totally sick. They were kind enough to send a guy over to take care of it... Except that he just told us, "This stuff makes it smell good." and sprayed what seemed like super Febreeze into our air conditioning unit. Three hours later, the apartment smelled exactly the same. This time I got massive headache and a sick-y stomach. Cool.
Amidst this, Jeff and I decided firmly that this place didn't meet our needs at all and that we really couldn't live in the odor (which really is pretty intense; our clothing totally smells like it. In fact, it simply seems as though someone is smoking right in our living room relentlessly. We took our concerns and four reasons for wanting to leave to the management. They were:
1. Cigarette smoke
2. We felt mislead
3. The apartment needed repairs
4. the overarching fact that we didn't get the apartment we planned on and didn't want to live there
While the management was very kind in handling the issues, they didn't have anything to offer on ending our contract and said we could sublease or relet the apartment (and be held responsible for any damage or fees on the subleaser's part).
Taking advice from parents and friends, we then contacted the regional manager and Texas Apartment Association. Both suggested subleasing or reletting. Still there was not even a hope for ending the year-long contract.
The accompanying trouble is that some apartments won't let us a sign a contract with them until we have written proof that our current contract has ended (understandably, of course). We just feel stuck...
We also learned that many universities have attorneys at no cost for students. We called at set up an appointment. So here we are, staying at a hotel while we pray for a miracle (because the conditions totally stink. Double. Meaning). So my serious question, has anyone been in a situation like this and made it out okay? I'm sure we sound high maintenance, but I ugly cried at the prospect of a year's worth of secondhand smoke piping right into our home we didn't even want. See ya; I've got some Blue Bell consolation ice cream calling my name...
*feeble laugh*
(Okay, first timer here. THIS STUFF IS SO GREAT!!!!! I love the South already.)
Wednesday, July 16, 2014
TEXAS!!
Moving day! You guys, we are really leaving!! Like, right now!!
See you on the other side, y'all. :)
Saturday, May 31, 2014
The Deets
A story to start:
Last Tuesday, as the Falco's and I were preparing Carly, my sister-in-law for her mission in Zambia, Jeff threw open the door and announced excitedly, "I just got accepted to Texas A&M!" Positive sentiments flooded the room. I'm sure Jeff was ecstatic. I personally am very happy and the buzz of {increased} financial security can't be beat.
So we embark on our journey. The white coat ceremony is midway through July, which changes some of our plans. Right now we are looking up jobs and housing. That is pretty exciting. If anyone has a lead with either of those let me know, please! :)
Let's be clear on something, I will be working full time and Jeff will not work. Sugar mama in the house. The only other alternative we've discussed is going through the military. Apparently they will pay your tuition. Temping as that may be, the collateral is a little steep, in my opinion.
As a result we haven't really made a decision. If anyone has insights on their experience going through the military for medical school, please share. Seriously. To me it seems like such a gamble. I don't know how the military would shape our lives on the whole.
All we know at this point is that we are moving to Texas. I can't believe Jeff and I are going to be Texans, and we are so excited! In the meantime, we are literally living in my in-laws' basement #ohtheplacesyoullgo. Funny story (if you're inclined to laughing at our misery, haha):
Last night we left our dear Provo apartment. We stayed up waaay too late doing cleaning checks, blew our kisses and said our goodbyes with our Queen-sized mattresses strapped to our car. Jeff and his father, Chris spent so much time rachet-ing down those puppies, but what do you know, they popped right off. On the freeway. While I was praying that we would drive safely... Jeff said three quarters of the "s" word. Hah.
We got out of the car, Jeff tinkered while I lent a concerned gaze (I know little about that sort of thing), and we drove off again, not being able to see out our back window. About three minutes later we pulled over again. Our mattress was coming up! Ahhh! I imaged it sliding off the back and killing everybody, and ex-nayed all notions of driving on the freeway. We switched to backroads, although Jeff suggested driving 35 mph.
After getting lost a couple times in Draper neighborhoods and an hour and a half later, we decided to get something to keep us awake (it was well past midnight at this point). We pulled into a McDonald's (the one by you, Grandma!) and in the light of the golden arches we put the boxspring on top of the mattress, instead of the other way around. Genius! We got back on the freeway and made it to Kaysville by 2:30 AM. Sweet! It was a night that makes you grateful for other nights. Jeff woke up today and said, I am so glad it's not yesterday anymore. Meee too.
I also feel inclined to add that I may throw projects and meals and such in here. From time to time I feel that urge and this may be a good landing place for my DIYs.
We are excited to move to Texas! I am excited that all of our boxes are packed two months in advance. We will keep you posted!
:)
Last Tuesday, as the Falco's and I were preparing Carly, my sister-in-law for her mission in Zambia, Jeff threw open the door and announced excitedly, "I just got accepted to Texas A&M!" Positive sentiments flooded the room. I'm sure Jeff was ecstatic. I personally am very happy and the buzz of {increased} financial security can't be beat.
So we embark on our journey. The white coat ceremony is midway through July, which changes some of our plans. Right now we are looking up jobs and housing. That is pretty exciting. If anyone has a lead with either of those let me know, please! :)
Let's be clear on something, I will be working full time and Jeff will not work. Sugar mama in the house. The only other alternative we've discussed is going through the military. Apparently they will pay your tuition. Temping as that may be, the collateral is a little steep, in my opinion.
As a result we haven't really made a decision. If anyone has insights on their experience going through the military for medical school, please share. Seriously. To me it seems like such a gamble. I don't know how the military would shape our lives on the whole.
All we know at this point is that we are moving to Texas. I can't believe Jeff and I are going to be Texans, and we are so excited! In the meantime, we are literally living in my in-laws' basement #ohtheplacesyoullgo. Funny story (if you're inclined to laughing at our misery, haha):
Last night we left our dear Provo apartment. We stayed up waaay too late doing cleaning checks, blew our kisses and said our goodbyes with our Queen-sized mattresses strapped to our car. Jeff and his father, Chris spent so much time rachet-ing down those puppies, but what do you know, they popped right off. On the freeway. While I was praying that we would drive safely... Jeff said three quarters of the "s" word. Hah.
We got out of the car, Jeff tinkered while I lent a concerned gaze (I know little about that sort of thing), and we drove off again, not being able to see out our back window. About three minutes later we pulled over again. Our mattress was coming up! Ahhh! I imaged it sliding off the back and killing everybody, and ex-nayed all notions of driving on the freeway. We switched to backroads, although Jeff suggested driving 35 mph.
After getting lost a couple times in Draper neighborhoods and an hour and a half later, we decided to get something to keep us awake (it was well past midnight at this point). We pulled into a McDonald's (the one by you, Grandma!) and in the light of the golden arches we put the boxspring on top of the mattress, instead of the other way around. Genius! We got back on the freeway and made it to Kaysville by 2:30 AM. Sweet! It was a night that makes you grateful for other nights. Jeff woke up today and said, I am so glad it's not yesterday anymore. Meee too.
I also feel inclined to add that I may throw projects and meals and such in here. From time to time I feel that urge and this may be a good landing place for my DIYs.
We are excited to move to Texas! I am excited that all of our boxes are packed two months in advance. We will keep you posted!
:)
